HIGH  HOLIDAYS SYNAGOGUE SEATING REQUEST FORM FOR 2011
 
During the last holiday  season, many individuals expressed concern over the seating arrangements in the synagogue. In order for us to place you in a  seat which will best suit you, we ask you to complete the following questionnaire and return it to the synagogue office as soon as possible.  
 
1. I would prefer to sit in the . . . (Check  one)   
______Talking section  
______No talking section
 
2.  If talking, which category do you prefer? (indicate order of interest)
_____ Stock market
_____  Sports
_____ Medicine
_____  Congregate' s secret medical tragedies
_____ General  gossip
_____ Specific gossip (choose)
_____ The rabbi
_____ The rabbi's  voice
_____ The rabbi's wife
_____ The  choir
_____ The rabbi's "secretary"
_____ Fashion news
_____ What others are  wearing
_____ Why they look awful
_____ Your neighbors
_____ Your neighbor's  relatives
_____ Prime Minister Brown
_____  Sex (Preference:______)
_____ Who's cheating on/having an  affair with whom
_____ Other:
 
3. Which of  the following would you like to be near for free professional advice?
_____  Doctor
_____     Dentist
_____     Nutritionist
_____     Psychiatrist
_____    Child  psychiatrist
_____     Mother in law
_____     Pilot
_____     Podiatrist
_____     Chiropractor
_____     Stockbroker
_____     Accountant
_____     Lawyer
_____     Criminal
_____     Civil
_____    Estate  agent
_____     Architect
_____     Plumber
_____    Buyer  (Specify store:_____________)
_____    Sex therapist
_____    Golf pro (tentative: we're still trying to find a Jewish one)
_____   Other:_______________

4. I want to be seated (Indicate order of  priority)
_____    On the  aisle
_____    Near the  exit
_____    Near the  window
_____    In  Aruba
_____    Near the  bathroom
_____    Near my  in-laws
_____    As far  away from my in-laws as possible
_____    As far away from my ex in-laws as possible
_____    Near the pulpit
_____    Near the Kiddush  table
_____    Near single  men
_____    Near available  women
_____    Near anyone  who's available - I'm bisexual or just not particular.    
_____    Where no one on  the bimah can see/hear me talking during services.    
_____    Where no one will  notice me sleeping during services
_____    Where I can sleep during the rabbi's sermon  (Additional Charge)
 
5. Orthodox only - I would like a seat where:
_____    I can see my spouse over the mechitza_____    I cannot see my spouse over the  mechitza
_____    I can see  my friend's spouse over the mechitza
_____    My spouse cannot see me looking at my friend's spouse over the mechitza
 
6. Please do not place me anywhere near the following people (limit of 6 names)
____________________
_________________________
__________________
____________________
_________________________
__________________
 
(If you  require more space, you may wish to consider joining another congregation)