I, SURVIVOR

                        I, SURVIVER  6-3-96

            This poem is dedicated to Susan Mary, without
            whose wisdom and love, I might still be a victim.

Hear me,
All you
Who are attentive to me now.
I survive!
For I live past and above my life that was.
For so I have chosen.
I dwelt once in despair and wrath,
And I lived in my life that was no life.
Yet now I have chosen.
I survive.
I have been loved and abandoned
By both Jehovah and Jesus Christ.
Yet I survive.
I have been loved and abandonded
By many women.
Yet I survive.
Other men,
Stronger, wealthier, more accomplished, more powerful
Than I
Have fallen down
And sleep the sleep from which they shall not awaken.
But I survive.
For they chose to live in their life that was no life
And I have chosen to live past and above my life.
For I love my life, and so I have chosen.

She who is a beacon to me has lighted my way.
Through her love and wisdom
I survive!
For she has breathed the breath of life into me,
And lifted me from my despair
And from my wrath.
By love have you resurrected me
And turned my clay to flesh again.
Most wonderous lady,
And adored,
And infinitely wise!
Breathe life into my soul,
And I shall live!